Weeding the Closet - Bagging up the "Fat Clothes"

Weeding the Closet - Bagging up the "Fat Clothes"

Actually, I was bagging up clothes in two categories. Some clothes were removed because they are way too big on me. Some were favorites - Disney tees, etc. - but they swim, so into the bag they go. The other category of clothes to remove is sleeveless and short-sleeved tops. Unfortunately, a combination of rapid weight loss AND minimal arm muscles means the upper half of my arms are really unattractive. I'm hoping that either 1) excess skin disappears over time (does that even happen?) and/or 2) I'll be motivated to use those weights sitting on my bedroom dresser to get my upper arms in shape. But in the meantime, they are not fit for public viewing, sadly.

The bag is huge and the question is then begged - what to do with all the clothes? There's the "throw them out and never go back" philosophy which is admirable. Then there's the "hedge your bets and store them somewhere" cowardly custard approach. I confess I'm keeping them. I like the clothes, and the pile represents a significant amount of money. Do I ever want to wear them again? NO I DO NOT! I plan to stay the size I'm at for the rest of my life, and never need to open that bag. But, I still can't get rid of them.

Part of it is that though I think I'm pretty good at losing weight - the excitement of the scale going down, the satisfaction of reaching a goal - I know that maintenance is a lot less exciting. And I'm not convinced that underlying food issues have gone away. I still like to eat, eat things that aren't particularly healthy (pizza, marshmallows, margaritas, rich Thai food, etc.), and don't do very well when feeling deprived.

I know the tools to maintain - logging, exercise, mindful eating, daily or frequent weighing, a mindset that considers healthy food and healthy portions to be good for my body. And also not considering certain food completely off limits. But old habits die hard. I'm not making excuses or trying to pave the way for gaining weight. I really really really do not want to gain weight back and will try my hardest to keep that from happening. I'm counting on never needing to open that bag again. But it's still going to be somewhere out in the dusty garage, probably providing mice and black widow spiders a place to nest. Off limits, but still not gone forever. Right or wrong, that's what I'm doing for now. Maybe someday I'll donate them, but not quite yet...

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Optifast Kaiser Diet - Down 55 Pounds

Optifast Kaiser Diet - Down 55 Pounds

Weigh-in tonight (missed last week) was down 2 pounds, which was good. I actually would have been fine with no change, but Thursday am leaving for 6 days at an inclusive family camp, and am worried about gaining. Lots of high carb food served family style with not that many healthy choices. I'm going to try my best!

Not on product-only for some time, but I still have a bar or two a day. I'm happy that I'm holding my weight down even while eating "real food" and certainly have had food that wouldn't be necessarily recommended, from champagne flights to fig chutney on French bread to frozen gelato. BUT, those are the exception, and I've compensated, and mostly I'm eating high protein, low carb, high veg. And not a lot. Sadly at my age my metabolism can't handle lots of calories.

Related to that, in a few weeks we'll have that test that tells us how many calories we should eat to maintain. But I had it maybe five years ago and it was distressingly low - related to muscle (and lack of) and exercise (and lack of). And age and gender are probably figured in too.

It's in the hundreds where I live this week so am SO happy I shed that 55 pounds or I would be SO miserable - sweaty, rashy, exhausted. Well done me, is all I can say, for my success on this program! And best wishes to anyone considering a similar program, starting out on it, struggling through it, hitting transition, or in the maintenance phase. I've gone probably from a size 18 to a size 8, so for me this program is a big thumbs up. And I hope in 5 years I say the same thing!

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The Danger of Delicious Food

The Danger of Delicious Food

I've realized that for me, the biggest danger with regards to healthy eating is that some food just tastes too darn good! So I'm fine when on Optifast product, and if my fridge and daily diet is full of eggs, tuna, salad, apples, plain yogurt, veggies, I'm OK too. No problem with portion control or overeating.

But put me at an all-you-can-eat pizza buffet, or hand me a jar of chocolate-covered apricots, or sell me a basket of ripe cherries from a road-side stand, and that food is gone, all of it.

My mom could make a box of Sees candy last a month. I obviously didn't inherit the self-control gene. It is really really hard for me to stop eating when food tastes good. Yesterday at a buffet I only had salad because I knew if I started on the other food it would be a pig-out. Not proud to say it, but I feel like I know myself after all these years, and I know that I will blow through any stopsign on the autobahn of eating when the food is yummy.

So do I just eat meh food the rest of my life? That's kinda what I'm thinking at this point! I did read that successful post-dieting folks limit the variety in their meals. So basically eat mostly the same thing day in, day out. That's probably due to this same problem.

So for now, I'm keeping the sexy, high-interest foods out of my fridge and pantry, avoiding certain restaurants, and hoping for no more chocolate apricot gifts. (It was from my son! From Vienna! And he knows I love apricots. And chocolate!)

My weigh-in last night was half a pound below a month ago, the previous weigh-in. If I was still trying to lose a lot of weight that would be a bummer. But actually, I'd be happy to maintain, so no gain was good news. Just gotta keep keepin' on!

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Challenging Week Ahead

Challenging Week Ahead

In an hour or so I'm off to a week at a "Family Camp" in the Sierras where our family goes every summer. This year there are extra challenges. Some of those include the record heat in California right now (and associated fire danger), and the rapidly-melting record snowpack along with the danger of flooding and extra-cold, extra-fast moving water (our cabin is right by a river). But, the main danger I'm worried about is the food! ;-)

Food is served more or less family style and is typically high-carb (spaghetti, etc.) with very few healthy choices, with the "veg" being some limp iceberg lettuce. And traditionally we take lots of snacks - and alcohol - for in-tent "happy hours" and all day munching by the water. Not to mention s'mores - yum!

I'm taking some shakes and bars, but at this point being back on "real food" it is hard to go back on mostly product at meals. But one way or another, I'm determined to survive the camping excursion without significant backsliding. Not only do I never want to go back to bad habits and old weight, but I have a wedding I'm going to on July fourth and a dress I need to fit into! ;-)

I'll be away from phone and internet service for a week. Wish me luck with surviving fire, floods and food, LOL!

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Totally Rocked the Family Camp Challenge

Totally Rocked the Family Camp Challenge!

Salad bar in the camp dining hall

So this was a first for me. I've been going to this family camp for years and it's always been an eat and drink binge pretty much. I was sooo focused on healthy eating this time. Didn't even open the bottles of wine and champagne (my favorite) that I brought for "happy hour" in our cabin. (The fact that it was in the 90s and higher also discouraged drinking alcohol.)

I brought my own dressing to lunch and dinner, and basically had a big plate of salad with whatever protein was being served. If the protein was too "saucy" (pulled pork, I'm looking at you), I just got by on the beans and cheese in the salad bar, and had a protein bar. Fruit was also served and so I had melon. I had eggs for breakfast, bacon once, and fruit. I was never hungry and it felt great.

I had a few splurges (rocky road ice cream at the camp store) and a few "tastes" (a bite of my granddaughter's s'more) so didn't feel deprived. And coming home, not sure what the scale would say, it was actually a pound or two lower than when I left! But we just got home yesterday and I sweated SO much at camp due to the heat that I'm thinking it was just water loss! In any case, I don't think I gained so YAY!

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Maintenance and Motivation to Weight Loss

Maintenance and Motivation

Despite challenges this summer - vacations, barbecues, weddings, and more - I am holding more or less steady (never gaining) at about 57 pounds lost. Since the goal stated at the top of my blog was to lose 30 (or 40, or even 50) pounds - and I would have been happy with 30! - this is a resounding success. Now I just need to keep it up. I'm a size 8 (started at 18) and this seems like a good place to stay. Maintenance isn't as sexy as losing. I love seeing the scale go down. So a different mindset is needed to get the same thrill from seeing the scale hold steady. But there are so many good reasons to maintain and stay motivated to keep the scale from going back up.

Regarding motivation, if someone asked at the start of the Optifast program about why I wanted to lose weight, I would have said my motivation was 75% health, 25% appearance. I'm going to be 64 on Sep. 1st, and yesterday celebrated my 35th wedding anniversary. I'm not out there on the dating scene or looking to wear bikinis. My husband seriously doesn't seem to notice whether I'm big or little. So my main motivation was improved health, as indicated by BMI, cholesterol, blood pressure, etc. And all those indicators have been good.

But there's another aspect I hadn't considered, related to health but more tangible than test numbers, and that is comfort. It makes my life much easier and more pleasant to be down over 50 pounds. Here are some examples:

• For our anniversary yesterday we went kayaking in Napa. It was easy going down the river, but then we had to turn around and paddle against the current to get back. It was hard and my arms are killing me today, but wow, if that kayak had been 50 pounds heavier it would have been even harder. So I was grateful that I only had to paddle my 140 pound self up the river, not my 197 pound self!
• I love taking my grandkids to Disneyland but last year thought I might have to quit, as it was getting too hard physically. I was too tired to keep up. It wasn't fun anymore. Now this year when I went in May it was completely different in terms of energy and endurance. Bring it on, Mickey!
• We go to Family Camp for a week every year. This year was especially hot (in the hundreds) and our cabin was up a hill. If I had been climbing that hill in that heat carrying 50 more pounds it would have been so miserable I don't think I would have lasted a day. I was so grateful to be facing that heat (and that climb!) without the extra weight.

These are just a few of the ways that this weight loss has improved my life. I am daily grateful for ALL the positive aspects of this weight loss journey!

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